20th March

I've always believed in never giving up until the end, in fighting to the final whistle. If 10-1 down in a match, getting back to all-square. Honour in being hard to beat. Even hopeless has hope in it, (thanks Red Dwarf).

Isabel has now had a full blockage and is unable to digest anything. We are to think of this as the beginning of the end. Whatever energy she has now must be expended on important things like Arthur, her parents, me, resolving things. Amazingly, Isabel is still thinking of others - she has put her savings into a trust fund, held a family meeting on the future for Arthur, writing cards and notes for him in the future.

The immediate targets are:

1. Hugh's (Isabel's brother's son to be) Birth
2. 2nd Wedding Anniversary (31st March)
3. Arthur's first birthday, (12th April)

We are having no visitors except essential ones.

A lot of people ask about how I'm doing. I am eternally grateful for Arthur, for the best 2 years of my life married to such an amazing ad brave woman. I said goodbye to a "normal life" a long time ago and have a completely different perspective on things. The fragility of life, how quickly things can change, the importance of each moment with the ones you love. There is no internet guide on this, no book on how to react and behave when your young wife's time is coming up soon. I hope I will be able to look back and say that I did a good job, had no regrets, wouldn't have done things differently.